Urgency mixed with impatiece and apprehension

This is a big step for us but I wonder if it’s too big for the time we have allotted for it. It’s a step we have needed to take for a long time but I was naive then and unwilling to lead in that direction until now. Now that I’ve come to terms with that, there is an urgency to push forward.

For some churches a big move would be purchasing their first piece of property or moving forward on some big building campaign. We just rented a small space in the center of Cleveland, TN. But when you have been portable and in most cases with absolutely no visibility, moving to a high trafficked area that is yours all week is pretty big.

There is an urgency because I know it’s the right step and it’s a much needed step. It marks an important phase of our church community. To explain what that phase is is outside the scope of this post but trust me, it’s a phase and it’s important for us to enter it.

The impatience I am feeling is because we should have done this sooner but for one reason or another I wasn’t ready. I had my eyes on a future that may or may not ever be to the degree that the needed present was lost to me. I guess I feel the need to make up for lost time and that has a tendency to make me a bit impatient.

My apprehension is the easiest to explain. This entire project is well outside of my own abilities. There is construction, remodeling, electrical, and many other areas that I have no skill or knowledge in. Furthermore, the one who has the most experience in these areas also has a job of their own and a new baby. I wonder how much he will be able to accomplish without a lot more help before he just can’t do anymore. Mind you he is the backbone of this whole remodeling. I also fear the longer that it takes the more we may decide doesn’t “need” to be done and settle for far less.

What does any of this mean? It simply means that I feel an urgency in the direction that I believe God is leading us. I am battling impatience because of the time I alone have wasted. And I am extremely uncertain that we can accomplish it all on time. Which means over the next week and a half I will be doing everything I can to learn what needs to be done and how to do it. I will be working with very little rest to see this project completed. And if for some reason we don’t make it, it will not be because I didn’t fight with all my strength to see it through.

And I won’t turn anyone away who wants to help…