As a pastor with a God given vision I want LifePoint to hear that vision and my faith but it would be a huge lie to say that I don’t have a whole lot of worries as well. These worries span from the everyday technical worries all the way to more eternal ones. In my attempt to be vulnerable and transparent through this series let me share some of the worries that I and probably every other pastor have.
These worries are things like will we be able to pay our bills or can we get our equipment to work properly in the service. These seem like no big deal worries, and trust me there are a whole lot more of them than 2, but yet there constant presence can be distracting and detrimental to the larger issues. We can spend so much time worrying about the immediate that we lose focus on the eternal. These everyday worries can come to consume every day.
If you cannot properly handle the everyday worries these worries are even more stressful. The reason is that you can work towards a vision with everyday worries in a state of chaos. Finding good leaders and responsible volunteers, launching appropriate programs and not meaningless ones, establishing systems that facilitate and not suffocate the vision are all vision worries. They are so vital and very overwhelming and no one but the pastor truly feels their weight. The church isn’t their job, club, or pet project, it is their calling.
I’ll be honest, this one keeps me up many nights. Will anything I do make a difference in your life? I know on Sunday you tell me what a good message it was but did it transform you? I know you said how much you needed to hear it but are you going to live it? I know you said that the reason you keep coming is because the messages are really good but do they really matter?
Do you talk to Jesus more? Are you any closer to Jesus having full control of your life? Are you less selfish and more concerned about those who can’t take care of themselves? Have you started to rely on God and not on your bank account for all your needs? Do you have an unquenchable need to see others find that same relationship with Christ? Am I making a difference?
My greatest fear is that in the end I will look back over time and find that I have not made one bit of difference in the lives of the people I gave myself to. Worried is an understatement.