Communications – Part 1

Machines would rule my life if I let them. Almost two weeks ago I share a post about how technology was having an adverse effect on me physically, mentally and even spiritually. Technology isn't bad. In fact it will always be a very strong passion and hobby of mine. But if I I'm not careful, technology and all that it offers could consume every part of me. I need boundaries.

Think of boundaries like a contract that you make with yourself to protect you from yourself. The reason it starts with you is because the boundaries you break for yourself will be the ones others break for you as well. Learn to say no to yourself and saying no to others will be a lot easier.

In these next few posts in this series I would like to first dabble with the topic of communication boundaries. I think I can trace my need to have an instant connection to others as well as others to me all the way back to December of 1999. At the time I still had a landline. Neither Angela nor I had cell phones. In fact I had just bought my first computer the year before so technology was a new adventure for me.

On one particular evening Angela and I decided to go out for dinner after work. We already worked pretty late as it was so it was very late by the time we got home that evening. We had a message on our answering machine. It was my brother telling us that my mother had been rushed to the ICU and was in very bad shape. She died the next morning.

I think in some way that has damaged me. I wonder if that has instilled this subconscious desire to always be available. After all, I never no when the next emergency will strike. I got to see my mother one more time before she passed but what if the answering machine didn't catch my brothers call? What if the phone lines were down? What if I was never able to get that message? I would have been devastated.

I'm sure that's not the only reason I have technology/communication issues but that didn't help. I have been instantly available from that time on. Whether via a mobile phone, email, Facebook, Twitter or some other form of social media I am always just a quick message away.

That's my story on my communication dysfunction. In the next few posts in this series I'll share boundaries I am setting for various types of technology.

What's your story?